Help the Economy: Shop American

I am going to say something bad. Try counting to 10 and thinking before you dismiss me. Try substituting curiosity instead of judgment. My bad words are: "I finally understand what it is to be American." Not only that, I know how to do my part in helping turn around America's flagging economy. Years ago I was a pilgrim abroad seeking other cultures to plant my roots. After a year of traveling I returned to my home. It's too complex to reiterate all the reasons why, but I knew I was an American and this was where I would live.

So one thing Obama has got right is that if we are going to shore up our economy, we have to buy American. I am suddenly obsessed with the idea in the most practical way.

The election night tableau of the Obama family on stage brought home how much has changed in American culture. The history-ready photograph that was seen around the world was color-coded, perfectly designed and purchased all-American. Now let's get this straight. I love my Valentino and was recently photographed for a fashion magazine in my favorite Galliano. Wearing my red Dior lambskin jacket butters my soul. (Okay, I'm a bit hyperbolic, it's only my skin.) But American is now my preference, and you will be glad to hear, it won't be St. John.

Obama didn't wear Zegna or Brioni, two European men's designers whose fabrics and cuts are as they say "to die for." He stuck with the darkest blue Chicago company Hart Schaffner Marx made and looked just swell. His red and grey striped tie color coordinated with Sasha and Maila's outfits, and Michelle's black and red was also designed by an American. I admit, on TV the dress looked awful, but after researching the dress, it was by Cuban immigrant Narciso Rodriguez, designer of the wedding dress worn by the late fashionista Carolyn Bessette Kennedy. Michelle had tossed an all-American black cardigan over the dress's curvy lines and had probably never realized that the lacey fabric didn't show well on TV. I've little doubt that she'll do better next time.

But I've gotten the message. For years I've said that Detroit had to go hybrid to compete, that windmills were for more than chasing after and that manufacturing and purchasing US made would be how our economy could grow. This country is a great pace to travel, and vacations to fit every desire can be had without leaving our states and territories.

Does this mean I will avoid the rest of the word? No. After all, we are a World Wide Web world. But I will think twice about keeping my purchase close to home. When possible, I will shop American products. I suggest you do too.

Caregiving and Sex: A Conversation

I used to say that my last book, When The Man You Love is Ill: Doing The Best for Your Partner Without Losing Yourself, wasn't really a sexy book. While it's true that Caregiving isn't usually considered a sexy subject, I do have an entire section devoted to taking care of your relationship. And one chapter, "Your Sex Life and Serious Illness," offers tons of psychological and practical tips on how to keep your sex life alive.Last week, I was traveling, appearing on media and speaking to groups on various subjects. Exhausted, I arrived for my final flight home. The airline attendant behind the center was someone I've gotten to know well. She's a lovely woman and as we chatted about my speech that morning at the Jacksonville Jewish Center and about her life, the subject of sex came up. "My husband was in a terrible car crash four months ago," Janine told me. "He almost died."I was taken aback at her news and as the airport was relatively empty, we continued to chat. He's been home recuperating and she's been the primary caregiver, mom of four young kids and trying to keep life functioning, one day at a time.I don't remember how the subject of sex came up. Maybe we were talking about the effect of his medications? Impishly, she looked at me and said, "My husband says the train is in the station, but he isn't able to board, but honey, come on over and hop on the caboose."Tired as I was, I left smiling. As I walked towards my plane, over my shoulder I said to her. "Consider that line too good not to be shared."

Thanksgiving: Maintaining Holiday Spirit While Learning from the Past

This Thanksgiving it is more important than ever to pay attention to what we have to be Thankful for. For me, it's health, family, friends the ability to pay bills and gratitude that I have the discipline to continue to exercise and eat well and think clearly. I add the latter "disciplines" as I believe that these are important factors for all of us to pay attention to in order to age positively.Amid screaming headlines such as "Market Fall Deepens as Concerns Mount on Banks" (Wall Street Journal, Nov. 21, 2008) and "Financial System Suffers Relapse" (Washington Post, Nov. 21, 2008), as well as hearing quite frequently that an additional (be my guest and name any astonishingly large figure) have been laid off at (name the company of your choice), millions in America are saying, "I can't sleep, I can't eat. I can't even breathe easily." They are obsessed with failed 401K's, looming non-retirement, job security, issues related to children's schools, health, etc. And what about sick parents, spouses and loved ones? What if you aren't sick, but are a caregiver as well? Many are having panic attacks, are depressed or are obsessively wondering where they went wrong and what to do. You may even be doing all those mentioned and more.So, during this most American of all holidays, the day set aside for family and gratitude, how do we overcome our fears and, for many, their terror about the future? We all know it's not going to get better soon. FiftyAndFurthermore.com can offer articles designed to give you practical tips to help you enjoy this holiday time. My own focus is how to help you deal with doom and gloom, if only for a day or two, and experience fulfillment and abundance. During these upcoming months, my FiftyAndFurthermore team and I will continue to give you practical information and sustainable information about how to cope with your emotional downs and ups as well as your finances. So look for our special section called Couch and Cash which will focus on your psyche as wells your pocketbook.We have much to learn from the past. Our grandparents or great-grandparents went from the high times of the 20's to the low times of the 30's. Now, we are the ones moving from the high times of the 90's and 2000's to the low times that are coming. They survived, loved, had sex, made babies and kept families together. So will we, and those of us over fifty will use our knowledge to help pave the way.This is a time to learn from nature's cycles and remember that "for everything there is a season" This is our season to remember our abundance, our love and the need to reach out to each other. This is the time for gratitude for what we have. No matter what else is going on, embrace those you love and those less fortunate than yourself. As a country, as individuals and as families, this is the time to remember that Life is too hard to do alone - Reach Out.